im starting to miss school a whole lot. i cant stand the emptiness at home, already. it's like the silence and the lonliness is killing me. with everyone else being busy and buzzed on their own things, im totally feeling every inch of boredom sinking into my skin and pores.

ugh, im feeling lonelyyyy.
take me out, somebody.
movies, or even the beach?
yeah, just to watch sunset.

gee, i sit by everyday doing nothing, waiting for time to pass hoping night will fall so then the house will be filled with SOME people. i miss the wacky and noisy rush of school. i need to get busy, dude!

seriously, my life spells L-O-N-E-L-Y now you know. lonely in almost every aspect. i feel deprived and sad. hah, blame it on Hady for being so busy with the whole showbiz thing he's going through. HAHA! okay, im dreaming again.

hah, tell me who's not when im so bored at home? Hady's rendition of 'Through the Fire' was on repeat mode on my playlist since i dont know when. it's just like.. okay, i dont want to start on my dreamy moods again. im feeling abit of emo now. haha, or rather these few days.

i feel like my friends, they're there for me. but somehow, they're not exactly there you know? like delta goodrem and brian mcfadden's "Almost Here". the words to it explains alot, lah. okay, but im being practical. they've got other friends too and their own lives to be busy with. im not their only friend, anyways.

HMM.. let's see. im pretty excited for Hari Raya that's coming. okay, maybe excited is not the word but im really looking forward to it. and i dont know why. despite the fact that not many of my cliques can go out for a real Hari Raya outing due to their exams and stuff, i just felt like i want to be close to Syawal (the month of Hari Raya Aidilfitri).

i think it's because i want to be near with my grandma again. i had a bad dream about her man. i dreamt that she left us. (though in the later part of the dream, she came back) but it was scary. and i swear im not ready to lose her anytime. i miss grandma.

i miss my biological dad, too. i really miss him alot. and i miss a few other people too. i guess they dont know but im always praying for them to be in a state of good health and happiness. sigh, i miss them so much that i wish they know.

=(

okay, i guess i'll end this pretty emo entry now. i dont want to break my fast by crying, now. ahahaha.

`Bee.

im sorry if i cant help missing you.