i love mamat not ateem. (:

the earthquake in Taiwan that's causing all the internet connection problem is really making things annoying, yesterday. it frusts me so much to keep signing in and out of MSN Messenger and the whole not-being-able-to-connect-to-the-net thing is making it worst.

thankfully today's a better internet-connection day (:

anyhoots, im starting to find my "slower pace" in life now (which is mostly slacking and lazing around) getting more and more boring. i think ive mentioned it somewhere in the previous entry but really la, im like finding myself not blogging because i really have nothing to blog about already.

and this is really bad.

plus the extinction of pictures to post, i feel so clueless already. & not to mention restless as well. everyday it's almost the same thing for me. waking up to the calls that i receive from dad to get up and do something around the house. then i did something and its back to being slumped in front of the laptop again. a few minutes later, check in on Hakeem for a second and then back into my room and start all over again. it's been mono. my life has been seriously mono.

i miss my girls.

i wonder how meyaa's doing. we dont chat up on the phone alot anymore nowadays. we've got our own stuff i guess. & i wonder how sriee, nurul, and even nana or qah are doing. i got to chat alil with sriee in the midst of the major internet disruption just now. glad she's fine and all. checked out her friendster profile for a sec and she looks as if she is going on fine. that's good. (: i missed her sarcasm la. how she'd go, "kau ni, pekak ke ape? telinger da bertahun tak korek agaknye.." haha, her-mocking-yet-funny-but-sarcastic self. owh, i miss sriee.

& qah? ive been seeing her online alot also. wait, online alot in the wee hours of the morning that is. the last i know is she holds her sleepiness and watch videos before getting really really sleepy and then, hit the sacks. now thats bad, dude. qah if youre reading this, STOP IT LA. why destroy your pretty eyes for them videos? like no other time to watch like that. chill babe! haha.

i hope nana & nurul are doing good too. & not forgetting lelaa. i hope she's been fine too. ARE YOU, lelaa? you are, right? hoho. sorry la i didnt tell you i was going to Batam. i didnt know you'd want to lend me your cammie and take pictures to let you 'feel' Batam heh. but yeah, i didnt mean it. i miss you la, doinks. i hope january really come quick because it's the attachments! & we're going to work at the same place, same time but different ward & different shifts? I HOPE NOT. =D

oh, update me on your schedule kay! like your shifts and all. or you could just agonisingly text me your admin no. (: whichever that you want im fine. hoho. & good luck in doing so! =O naw, just kidding. =)

i really wish i could track back alil and treasure the moments i had with them girls more before this. before i knew i was going to move to Yew Tee, before i knew things were about to take a heeugge turn. but then again, this kinda wish will never happen so i should just quit wishing and try to do something about it.

anyways, the tracks in my playlist are getting more and more boring. its like there's nothing else nicer to look forward listening to. i want a playlist update! somebody, anybody.. pass me songs please. im dying in the same old mono tracklist that i have with the crazy internet connection to add to the madness.

damn, my life IS mono. mono . mono . im mono-phrenic.

:l

okay omg, no.

i just realised that my life is about to get all topsy-turvy again once january comes. bite this: IT'S NOT GOING TO BE A GOOD START TO THE YEAR!

okay, minus all the drama, im just afraid of the exams & the undeniably irritating project/presentation that's going to be due soon la. with the procrastinators that my group is made up of, i just dont know how to keep the group going at all. ive tried to be more relaxed and not rush them too much on the project work, but it's just making it all worst. it's like all the more they think they should slow down because i say so.

im, what? the PILLAR of the group? oh, no thanks. i dont wish to believe so even if i think im more than that. im sorry to sound braggy but im just so tired of having to panic and rush at the wrong things which needed rush way much earlier than this. just like the current presentation that we're supposed to have already started on, nobody is doing -or even asking- anything about it. i bet theyre still enjoying their skimpy "two week break" while it lasted la.

i know i couldve started on it and stop complaining. but how long should i be the one pushing through when im not even the leader? and speaking of the leader, omg, dont make me go there. i just want the people from my group to see how important group works are to me and how they should know it is important to them too.

BUT NOBODY CAN MAKE THEM SEE & I GIVE UP.

i hope the new semester comes, soon. as much as im really reluctant to switch groups, i really need a break. & i swear im praying for a BETTER group to work in. with no more disasters to handle and all. i need out.

I NEED OUT.

`Bee.